


Two bros chillin in a hot tub

by Jay_Spank



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Keith just gets tired and sad, Lance is a fun drunk, M/M, Underage Drinking, hot tub fun, lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-24
Updated: 2017-01-24
Packaged: 2018-09-19 15:34:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9447722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jay_Spank/pseuds/Jay_Spank
Summary: Lance finally has some free time and decides to drink some nice Altean wine in the nice Altean hot tub, but Of course, Keith shows up.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I am very tired and Im sorry if this sucks. lol. enjoy

Between battling the Galra, maintaining the ship, and training, Lance had barely any free time. Even taking a somewhat long hot shower was pushing it. So when nights like tonight happened, when no planets needed his heroicness, the castle didn’t need his expert cleaning skills, and when Shiro chose to realize that Lance was awesome and didn’t need training, he had a whole evening up to his own devices, he god damn cherished it like it was the last fry in the bottom of the McDonald’s bag. 

Lance had always knew had to treat himself and he treated himself to say the least. He would put on his swim trunks, go to the kitchen and get a battle of the Altean version of wine, his special fancy curly straw Hunk had made for him sense there was a lack of curly straws in space, and would head to the pool area. Then he would turn on sound system that’d play classical music and kick the fuck back in the hot tub, sipping from his bougie space wine, with his awesome curly straw, humming softly to the music, and stretching out like a cat in sunlight. He felt like a god. It was truly heaven on Earth, or heaven in space he guessed. His friends did not share his same opinion. Allura warned that the Altean drink he was drinking had twice the alcoholic content than his Earth wine. Which was lit. More bang for his sip. Pidge commented that he was underage, which Lance retorted that in space no one can hear you get shitfaced. Drunk people made Hunk anxious, which Lance respected because it’s Hunk. How could he not? Shiro also said that it was very irresponsible of Lance to drink when at any moment the Galra could attack. Keith, the kiss ass he was, agreed. Wow! What a surprise! But before Lance could quip back that that’s a good reason to drink, good ole uncle Coran came him and handed Lance a packet of little white pills. One little white pill would instantly make him sober if he was needed in full mental capacity. Lance took the pills and saluted Coran for supporting getting lit. He left, leaving the others to explain to Coran that he was not supporting arson. 

So Lance was relaxing in the hot tub. Several sips of wine in. He already had a heavy buzz going on. Singing along to the instrumental song playing. “ DUN DUN DUN DOOON DAAA DEWW PPEWW PEWW” This was the sickest part of the song because the tuba drops and it royal fucks shit up. Lance stood up, wine bottle in hand and started dancing. Drunk him was an amazing dancer that sometimes he felt that he danced so well that he was one with the water and make it dance with him. It truly was an out of body experience each time. “HeeEeeEEyyyy WAtttAA,” he sang, has he did the Macarena to the beat, “how dew my legs feeeel? Cuz I must be stepping on you or something? Which is like SUPER uncool, but I like stepping on you too much because it makes like jello.” Lance then fell over with laughter at his own self, falling back on the hot tub’s under water bench. “Oh boi, Imma a lil lit,” He sighed and looked down to see that some of his wine had fallen into the water. Lance whined. He hated wasting wine and he also had no dignity. So like any reasonable wino, Lance slurped the hot tub water. “LOOk, my mom TOld me never to drink pool water, BbButttt she also said never to waste anything. So it’s a balance,” he said between slurps. 

“What the fuck.”  
Lance spit out the wine hot tub water and shot his head up to see that it was fucking Keith standing across from him. Fuck. He found his face heating up. Fuckity fuck. Stupid ass Keith Looking like an emo dream boat, making him spit out his hot tub wine. Quick, he had to say something cool. SO Keith would feel hot and bothered. The perfect revenge. 

“Koof,” Lance said spinning his bottle like a wine glass, “Imma lushery few can afford.” He took a sip, and gave his best sexy stare at Keith who looked dumbfounded. Goddamn Lance fucking showed him. HaHaHA. 

“You said Koof.”

“Hmm?”

“You called me Koof. My name is Keith,” He stated, giving Lance an amused look. Okay maybe Lance didn’t show Keith. 

“mmm? Oh really? I don’t recall. I suddenly can’t see. I’ve become,” He placed his bottle on the surface and stood up and paused for dramatic effect, “LEGALLY BLIND!” With that he flopped himself into the water. Oh god that was good. That was so funny. Keith didn’t know what hit it, but what had hit Lance was that when you laugh under water, water goes into your mouth and your lungs and then you can’t breathe. He shot back up, coughing and flailing. Jesus Christ he was going to die. Lance couldn’t register that Keith had jumped into the hot tub and started giving him the Heimlich. Lance spat out water, but Keith was still a mother fucker. 

“Keith, you quizfuck, stop!” Lance yelled and flailed, forcing Keith to let go. 

“I was only trying to help Lance. You were choking!” Keith said defensively. He was right. Lance was in fact choking. Though typically when you drowned you do that kissing stuff. Which he at the moment would not mind to do with Keith. Which was only because he was drunk and loopy. That was it. But he had to reward Keith for his heroicness. He grabbed his bottle. 

“This is your award, Keith. For saving the cool as fuck like of me, Lance.” He held the bottle out to Keith who looked at it like it was something stupid like Keith! HA! But seriously this was getting annoying. “Keith take the bottle. You can have the rest of it.” Keith shook his head. 

“I don’t want it. I didn’t come here to drink.” 

“Then why are you even here Keith?

“Because Shiro said I needed to take a break from training and Hunk and Pidge are trying to invent new math problems. So I decided to see what you’re up to and maybe... hang out?” Keith looked uncomfortable and Lance couldn’t help but start laughing. Oh this socially awkward tart was too much sometimes.

“Lance! Why are laughing! Nothing is funny!” Keith was blushing. Oh my god, this bitch.

“You’re funny, dummy,” Lance smiled and booped Keith’s nose making him blush more. Oh my fucking god this bitch. “But if ya wanna hang out. You gotta get on my level and drink the rest of it though. Cuz I drank a lil more than half and BITCH I AM TOASTED! Also you gotta take off your clothes because you can’t be hot tubbin in your anime shit.”

Keith glared at Lance, clearly assessing if following Lance’s demands would be worth it. After what felt like forever Keith sighed, grabbed the wine bottle and sat it on the dry tile and clumsily took off his shoes and jacket and shirt. 

“Fine, but I’m not taking off my pants,” Keith huffed throwing is water soaked clothes to the dry tile. Lance dumbly nodded as he stared at Keith’s chest. He reached and put both hands on Keith’s nipples. 

“Lance what the fuck!” Keith shoved his hands away, but Lance just put them right back on those perky nip nops. 

“I’ve never associated you with having nipples and now I see them in real life and it’s like when people see Jesus in toast for the first,” Lance said awestruck. Keith was as red as his jacket and shoved Lance away again. 

“Lance, I’m not drunk enough, for you to be this goddamn weird.”

“Well then fucking chug bitch,” Lance huffed, taking his curly straw out of the bottle, because you can’t chug with a curly straw silly, and shove the bottle into his hands. Keith looked down at the bottle in his hands and then at Lance and then back down at the bottle and began chugging that mother fucker.

“GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO!” Lance cheered until Keith slammed that bottle down like a fucking champ. Lance waited in anticipation as Keith just stood there blinking hard.”

“You good Keith?”

“ Imverydrunk.”

Lance started to laugh. Keith joined in. Holy shit was this a sight to see. Lance and Keith both drunk, laughing together in a hot tub. Space was a weird place. 

“So….. what now?” Keith asked catching his breath. Lance wiped the tears from his eyes and sighed about to answer when he heard the beginnings of the one slow dance classic song playing through the sound system. 

“Keithkeithkeithkeith we gotta dance.”

“Dance?”

“Yeah. I’ve never had a human dancing partner. I only had the water and we need to dance.”

“I don’t know how to dance.”

“Well I’ll teach you. I’m a great dancer.” With that Lance placed Keith hands around his neck and wrapped his hands around Keith’s waist and began swaying side to side. “See Keith? It’s easy. Just sway side to side annnd just let the music take you.” 

“You’re so cute Lance.” Keith laughed as he rested his head on Lance’s chest. Lance blushed. Oh this son of a bitch. Why Keith? 

“Bitch I know I am,” Lance nervously laughed feeling more hot than usual. Keith giggled. 

“Am I pretty Lance?” 

“Yes, but not as pretty me.”

Keith started laughing and then out of nowhere started crying. 

Lance stopped and looked down at Keith. Did he do something wrong? “Keith? What’s wrong?”

“You’re gonna be mean tomorrow.”

“Wait... what?”

“You’re gonna be sober Lance and sober Lance doesn’t like me and thinks I’m gross and has stupid hair and then I’m gonna have to be mean and we can’t dance or call each other cute or maybe kiss and I don’t like that,” Keith sobbed harder into Lance’s chest.

Lance at the moment could not process fully what Keith was saying. All he knew was that he felt shitty because he made Keith feel shitty and fuck him honestly. 

“But we’re not mean now.”

“Yeah.”

“And are you shleepy?”

He could feel Keith laugh into his chest. 

“So shleepy Lance.”

“Well,” Lance said guiding then both to the sitting ledge on the hot tub, “we can shleep here and cuddle and deal with mean us in the morning?” 

 

Keith sat on Lance’s lap, and adjusted accordingly. Even when Keith was drunk he was surprisingly graceful. “Okay Lance okay, “He yawned resting his head against Lance. 

“We’re gonna be so pruney tomorrow”

“Pruney and mean” 

“Yeah, pruney and mean,” Lance sighed and closed his eyes just wishing to be stuck in this moment forever.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed it. It's almost one in the morning. A bitch has school. lol. Good luck my fams. Also I'm a slut for comments because I crave attention. Lolololol


End file.
